Reign costume porn: Queen Mary edition
Éomer, son of Éomund, Third Marshal of Riddermark, King of Rohan
tw xmas meme: → Day 15 - Guest Star
~ Meghan Ory as Laura Hale
“Excuse me,” a man says, and Stiles turns from the inventory list he was double checking to find the most gorgeous man standing on the other side of the counter, looking frantic. If this was a Christmas movie, well, it’d be a porno because this guy couldn’t be real. There’d be no clichéd falling in love, just lots and lots of hot sex. Preferably with the man’s perfect thighs and delicious stubble in the starring roles. “Um, can you help me?” The guy’s brow furrows because Stiles is still just standing there staring at him.
“Um, yeah, sure,” Stiles shakes his head. “What can I do for you?”
“I need a doll.”
“We have those,” Stiles nods.
“A particular doll,” the guy says, “for my daughter. I’ve been everywhere. Toys R Us, Walmart, Target – no one has it.” Stiles knows he should feel really bad for wanting to bone the guy who just needs a last minute doll for his kid.
“Well, it is Christmas Eve,” Stiles smiles. “But Stilinski Toys is better than those places anyway. Sure, you might save ten dollars, but you’re also supporting a corporate giant who’s trying to put a guy like me out of business.”
The guy stares at him. “I just want a doll.”
Stiles shakes his head. “Yeah, yeah, sure, sorry, long day and I tend to ramble when I’m tired, and it’s Christmas Eve and I still haven’t done my Christmas shopping, and you can’t exactly get a twenty-five year old guy a toy, well, except an action figure, but that’s different.” Stiles smiles and steps out from behind the counter. “I’m Stiles, by the way.”
“Derek.” Stiles nods as he leads Derek towards the back of the store where the dolls are.
“All right, Derek. Tell me about this doll.”
“It’s a Barbie, and I don’t know, there’s some playset that goes with it. Barbie is like a doctor or an astronaut or – “
“You have absolutely no idea which doll she wants, do you?” Stiles asks with an amused smile.
“Not a clue.” Derek sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “I mean, all Agatha’s talked about for months is this doll, and how have I not remembered the name, I swear I listen to her, and ohmigod, I’m the worst dad ever, how can I not remember the name of – “
“Whoa,” Stiles says, holding up his hands. He jogs down the aisle and drags the step ladder over to Derek, and then grabs him by the shoulders and pushes him down. “You need to calm down. Do you need a soda? I have soda. And Christmas cookies.”
“No,” Derek says, putting his head in his hands. “I need this doll.”
Stiles drops down to the floor, and Derek looks up at him desperately. “Look, Derek. I don’t know you, but it’s obvious you’re a great father.”
“Stiles, you don’t have to be nice.”
“I’m not being nice. I’m incapable of lying – Santa doesn’t come if you’re on his naughty list, unless it’s a bad porno – not that I, um, oh god I can’t believe I just said that, oh shit, anyway. Point is, bad parents don’t frantically search for the perfect gift on Christmas Eve. Bad parents buy whatever or don’t care.”
Derek’s face is somewhere between amused and horrified, and Stiles is pretty sure his own face is the color of Santa’s suit. This is why he was still single.
“My daughter is seven,” Derek says. “She saw this doll on TV, but not on the commercials, it’s some really popular item this Christmas according to the news.”
“And it’s a Barbie?” Stiles asks, pushing himself off the floor and going to the Barbie section. “And there’s a matching playset?”
“Yes, according to my daughter.”
Stiles scans the shelves, his brain scrolling through all the new Barbie items this year. “Is it the Western Wonderland Barbie with the camping playset?”
“YES!” Derek shouts. “She has a cowboy hat and blue tights and cowboy boots!” he says excitedly. “That’s the one, I remember now because Agatha went on and on about how she could take her Barbie with her when we go camping with the Pac – um, our family.”
“Yeah, that’s awesome. But – “
“Please no but,” Derek says, his voice cracking. Stiles looks over his shoulder, and he’s pretty sure he’s about to see a grown (gorgeous) man break into tears over a Barbie.
“No but. Come with me to the back. I’ll see if there’s one.” Derek follows Stiles into the store room. “Why did you wait until the last minute to shop?”
“I work full time, am a single dad, and have a seven year old. Doesn’t leave much time for anything else.”
Stiles nods as he starts rummaging through shelves. “So, is this all she gets?”
“I’ve bought some things over the last few weeks, but every time I went to get this doll, I either forgot its name or they were sold out.”
“Well,” Stiles smiles, grabbing the doll and the playset from the back of a shelf. “Today is your lucky day, Derek.”
“Ohmigod,” Derek says breathlessly. “This…this is the best. You are truly a Christmas miracle worker.”
“Perks of shopping local,” Stiles says lamely as he carries the items out to the register. “And since it’s Christmas Eve, it’s Stilinski Toys’ gift to you.”
Derek just blinks at the items. “I can pay, I – “
Stiles holds up his hand. “I’m just glad your little girl got what she wanted.”
He thanks Stiles and takes the bags, but then he pauses when he gets to the door. “Stiles,” Derek says, turning around, “Hypothetically, if I was to find time for something else, would you be interested in dinner?”
Stiles’ mouth falls open. “Um, yes. One hundred percent yes.”
Derek smiles, and holy shit, it’s like he’s made of fucking sunshine. As Derek waves and exits the store, Stiles realizes that this did just absolutely turn into a clichéd Christmas movie. He finds he’s oddly okay with that.
Peter Hale + 3A quotes